Azza mocks me for praying in onesies

Azza exchanges the robes of freedom
for the silky toabs of comfort, swears
gossip travels farther than hadeeth
ever could. no matter how many times
they burn down cities to ashes to
fuel islamophobia, the bond does not break.
no matter how many times we offer our
children to the fire, the flames remain insatiable.
our love letter to god never has any return address.

deep in sujood, I am one with the earth
always returning to Allah, but never arriving
Azza swears customs are stronger than
beliefs, no matter how many times I tried
to split the two, the bond remained covalent.
I am but a subatomic particle
always splitting, always dividing

I wear Azza’s umbilical cord around
my waist, belt in all the dreams I lost in the fire
sometimes I am a small apartment city girl
other times I fall from my island hammock
to the countryside’s bungalow.
Azza continues to burn for me, until I see the
road back that leads me back to her

________

SARA BEDRI is a 23 year-old Sudanese poet, intersectional feminist and Libra moon who self identifies as the symbol ‘&’ between rhythm & blues.  You can find her on IG @SaraBalladry