If I Were A Poor White Single Mother

I read something at Forbes today because several of my friends on Facebook had linked the article. Here it is.

If I Were A Poor Black Kid.

The author, Gene Marks, describes himself as a “short, balding, and mediocre public accountant.”  He’s also White, gainfully employed, and miles away from childhood. Why would such a person imagine himself a poor Black kid? Furthermore, should he?

Allow me to go back a month when I assigned my composition students “process papers.” Essentially I asked them to either write a process explanation or a set of instructions for completing a specific task; however, before they could get to writing the actual instructions or providing any sort of explanation, they had to write how and why they were qualified to instruct thier audience in completing said task. I called it “establishing authority.” My students did a pretty good job of it, too, as most of them explained something they’d done several times over, often by trial and error, and had personal experience with.

I bring this up because Marks’ essay reads like a process explanation in which he imagines himself a poor Black child in America describing just how he’d create success for himself despite the odds.  For instance, he’d earn the best grades possible, use all the technology available to him, and became an expert at Google Scholar.

I don’t know about you, but any time I’m about to receive advice from someone I ask myself what qualifies this person to give me advice. The answer to this generally determines how “to-heart” I’ll take his or her advice not to mention whether or not I’ll silently send him or her to Hell. Everyone’s a fucking expert, right?

If Marks showed up in one of my writing classes and wanted to write this particular essay as a process explanation, I’d tell him what I told my other students. Establish your authority. What makes you qualified to offer advice to poor Black children? Apparently, here’s what makes him qualified.

“I am not a poor black kid.  I am a middle aged white guy who comes from a middle class white background.  So life was easier for me.  But that doesn’t mean that the prospects are impossible for those kids from the inner city.  It doesn’t mean that there are no opportunities for them.   Or that the 1% control the world and the rest of us have to fight over the scraps left behind.  I don’t believe that.  I believe that everyone in this country has a chance to succeed.  Still.  In 2011.  Even a poor black kid in West Philadelphia. It takes brains.  It takes hard work.  It takes a little luck.  And a little help from others.  It takes the ability and the know-how to use the resources that are available.  Like technology.  As a person who sells and has worked with technology all my life I also know this.”

Satisfied?

Sure, if you’re a middle-aged White guy.

Now, here’s the other question I’d ask Mr. Marks if he were my student: WHO? IS? YOUR? AUDIENCE?

Poor Black kids?  Doubt it.

First of all, imagine a poor Black kid coming across this article in the first place then feeling optimistic when he or she reads that paragraph up there. Marks hasn’t established anything at all with Black children except he hasn’t walked a mile, even a minute, in thier shoes. Mr. Marks isn’t writing to or for poor Black children. He’s writing to people who read Forbes Magazine, and who reads Forbes Magazine? Not me, for one, ever. Except the time all my Facebook friends linked this article.

If Marks has ever spent time with poor Black children in West Philadelphia he’d better say so. If he does or has ever lived in a poor Black neighborhood, even a poor one, he’d better say so. Furthermore, what sort of adversity, prejudice, bigotry, and hardships has Marks experienced in his own lifetime then overcome? This kind of information is imperative if you’re going to imagine yourself a poor Black kid in America.

Hell. It’s imperative if you’re going to write anything that smacks of emotional truth. (Yeah, that’s a fiction writing term, “emotional truth,” meaning if you’re going to write outside your gender, race, or sexual preference, generally your own life experience, you must identify just how and why you emotionally empathize with your character. For instance, I often write as young gay men, and I feel I write from an emotionally true place in those instances because I know what it’s like to live a double life, to hide parts of myself, to suppress parts of myself, to feel ashamed, to feel afraid, to feel thwarted. Not to mention I’m a bisexual man trapped in a woman’s body.)

Anyway. Here’s another question for Mr. Marks. Has he ever stepped foot inside an inner city school? I have. And you don’t talk to those kids like that. Jesus Christ.

I’m not saying a White guy can’t offer advice to poor Black children. I’m just saying he shouldn’t do so in a column for Forbes. But, as I’ve already suggested, Marks didn’t have a single real-live Black child in mind when he wrote his column. What he had in mind was his imaginary poor Black child self whom he spent all of ten seconds getting to know. What Marks had in his mind was President Obama’s speech in Kansas concerning inequality in America and how it’s “the defining issue of our time.” Yes, it’s an issue; it’s always been an issue; and now our Black president has said as much, and Marks appears to concur in his article. Sort of.

Equality is a problem in America, but if I were a poor Black kid it wouldn’t be a problem for me.

What a trooper. What an optimist. He’s got the inside track, that guy. After all, Gene Marks has written five books and is a contributing columnist for Forbes online. In other words, he’s a more successful writer than me if we’re sticking to number of books published. Also, Forbes is pretty high-profile, right? Likewise, I’m certain Marks earns more money than I do, “mediocre” or not.  He’s an accountant, and I’m currently an adjunct college professor who earns less than a grand a month.

That being said, six short months ago, my former boss laid me off and as a result I collected $468.00 a month in unemployment and fed my son by the good graces of food stamps. So I’ve improved my circumstance by $300.00 a month since August. Also, we’re no longer receiving food assistance. My wages plus child support put us $15.00 over the cut-off line for public assistance by September, which is sort of a mixed blessing, to tell you the truth,  because we’re literally squeaking by.  Squeaking.

Maybe Marks’ could apply his optimism to another article for Forbes next month. “If I Were A Poor White Single Mother.”

“I am not a poor white single mother.  I am a middle aged white guy. So life is easier for me.  For instance, I’m a man, and that’s a big advantage, not to mention I’m not a single father, but if I was I could still date and enjoy a social life because I could leave my kids with their mother on weekends or at least share parenting responsibilities with her. Not to mention women love single fathers. They’re sexy. Single mothers? Not so much. Baggage alert! Those women are just dying to get married in order to remedy thier financial straits and secure father figures for their bastard children. Which reminds me, I’m not a bastard child, but if I was . . .”