Ask The Author: Devan Goldstein

On writing and marriage, in response to “Three Short Essays for Aubrey Hirsch.” 

1. How did your wife react to these essays when you showed them to her? Did you clear it with her before sending them off? What, if any, rules of writing engagement do you have?

Here’s what I would’ve said: “We’re both pretty hands-off about it, though we do give each other an advance read of our non-fiction, mostly as a by-product of asking for feedback.” But then I showed her this question, and she said she felt like we do a decent amount of tinkering with each other’s work. I don’t remember what’s true, except that there is one piece she won’t let me send out. And it’s only peripherally about her! And it’s so good!!

2. Where did the idea of a long distance marriage come from? Will it ever stop being long distance?

We’ve already moved back in together, thankfully. I’ve just finished a longer-form essay about why we were apart, though. The short version: Aubrey got a fellowship in Colorado, we moved there, and I turned out to have an altitude-related sleep disorder. I moved back to low ground, but besides finishing out the academic year she’d already committed to, we decided that the second year of the fellowship was too good to pass up.

3. How has your technical expertise influence your writing?

I’m happy with my previous answer (see #6).

4. What soundtrack do you use to rip out your own heart?

Truth? I’m less and less interested in heart-ripping music. It’s lazy, but at this point, most of my listening happens in the car. I just skip around on random till I find a song I enjoy singing- and then I sing along to it like 20 times, or more. I listened to nothing but this one Marc Anthony song, a really good salsa cover, for months last spring.

5. Has your wife written counter essays to these?

No. She doesn’t really like me the way I like her.

6. Are you a confident liar?

I am a supremely confident liar, but I rarely put my skills to use. Most of the time, telling the truth is just easier.